Finding Your Place

Many of us have those special places we retreat to. For me, that is Maine.

A place that I’ve visited every summer of my life, a place that is connected to generations of my family, who always find themselves back in Maine, summer after summer.

It’s a place of ritual. Raising the flag … picking blueberries … climbing the rock ledges and searching for “ringed” rocks on the shore that are sure to bring good luck. Testing our stamina in the freezing cold water. Enjoying that little box of maple walnut fudge - an annual gift from a cousin in honor of my mom, who was a huge fan of maple walnuts in all its forms.

Family cocktail parties at the end of the day … offering a time to connect, share some appetizers and some conversation.

Connection is the key word here. Maine is a place where I feel connected. Connected to my family, connected to the beautiful surroundings of pine and sea and rocky coast.

But I’m also connected to its simplicity.

We return every year to the little cabin my grandparents built … always happy to see that it has survived another winter and affording the opportunity for my sister, cousins and me to enjoy it during our summer vacations.

The setting never changes. Just the same as when I was a kid. Just the same as when my father was a kid. And my grandmother too.

I walk in and it has that old familiar rustic smell. The pink rafted ceiling that my grandfather painted so long ago makes me smile. I re-read my grandmother’s poems on the walls, and look at my father’s lobster artwork he created over the years.

No TV. No phone. A little tiny stove. No dishwasher. And you know what? It’s perfect.

This August my vacation is different. It is the first time in 28 years I've been up here without my children. While I miss them terribly, it is also luxurious. Because I realize every moment I have, I can control.

So as I sit here typing, with a cool breeze blowing in the window, and the luxury of glancing out onto Blue Hill Bay, I have decided to think of this week as my “retreat” week. An escape to a place that I adore, where I can think, write, and continue to work through the business building of my coaching practice.

There’s no better place for “deep work” - which I wrote about in an earlier blog post this summer - (https://www.anneengelhealth.com/blog/creating-focus-time-for-deep-thought). Often times our ability to do deep work requires a different environment, a place of little to no distractions.

I think about E.B. White, who lived just down the road from us, who would retreat to his version of a seaside shack, with just his typewriter, to create his fabulous children's stories, or another essay for The New Yorker.

E.B. White sits at his typewriter in his seaside cabin in Maine

I was fortunate enough to meet him when I was a little girl given my Mom’s bravery … or maybe I should say audacity … to walk my sister and I up to his front door and knock. I held my copy of Charlotte’s Web that my grandmother had given me, close to my chest.

Mr. White opened his door, graciously invited us in, and we sat with him in his dining room, as he read my grandmother’s note in my book and signed just below it. He then took us out to his barn and showed us where Charlotte’s Web had been woven, and introduced us to his farm animals.

I am so profoundly grateful for this experience and it is one more example of why this place is just so darn special to me.

E.B. White clearly recognized that escaping to a place where he could focus on his work … delivered extraordinary results.

Focused time is clearly a luxury. It’s rare to find the time to really focus. Especially if we do not plan for it or have the intention to do so. Having focused time means not picking up our phone every few minutes to glance at a text or notification. It’s not getting distracted by the many messages circling our brains of all the other things we need to cross off the list.

So I’m curious about a couple of things. Since writing my earlier newsletter on focus … did anyone take that to heart and think through how to create blocks of focused time to maximize productivity? If so, I would love to hear about it.

What are you doing … are you doing it consistently … and have you found a special place to work and ponder, free of distractions? While I write about my special place in Maine - it’s also important to create our own special place within our home - a place that sets us up for focused attention. A place where we’re comfortable. And maybe inspired.

Ask yourself, “what types of things inspire me”? Or, “what types of things inspire me to do my best work?” It could be as simple as a clear desk and a cup of coffee.

My other curiosity is - do you have a special place that you like to visit? If so, where is it and what makes it special to you?

Maybe spend some time journaling about it. It may be a place that you regularly visit … or it could be a once special place that you kind of have forgotten. What makes it special … why do you like to return? Can you make time for a visit, especially if it has been awhile?

A place that you connect to is multi-dimensional in its benefits. It can provide a respite, perhaps solitude. It can be a holder of memories, and a place for reflection.

Find your place - wherever that is - and connect to the benefits that it can bring you. You may be surprised by what you will discover.